Friday Finds #2

Hello (3)

It’s been an eventful three weeks since my last Friday Finds list. There have been ups. There have been downs. And then there have been some awesome moments of self-reflection, self-discovery, and emotional growth. New routines like swimming and taking my dogs to the dog park have been solidified, and I’ve experienced some memorable events like The OC County Fair and an awesome play titled Obama-Ology. In between it all there’s also been some peanut butter, some cleaning, and some hard core dancing. Which leads me to…


1. PB Fit Organic Peanut Butter Powder

If you haven’t heard already, I LOVE peanut butter. Love it. As in, I’ll put it on just about anything. In smoothies, on pancakes, in scrambled eggs, smeared on a baked banana with some dark chocolate… everything. In my former non gluten-and-dairy free life I was known for buying a box of ice cream sandwiches, unwrapping them all, carefully splitting one cookie layer off, spreading it with peanut butter (and sometimes jelly), and then sandwiching them all back together before wrapping them all back up and stashing them back in the freezer. Peanut butter makes my world go round. And for the most part I have no qualms with eating it provided it’s made from just peanuts, contains no added sugar, and is organic. For this reason, I never really understood the point of peanut butter powder. Sure, it’s lower in calories and in fat, but since I don’t recommend calorie counting to my clients and don’t believe that fat is the root of all evil, it always seemed a bit unnecessary to me, even if fitness experts, bloggers and Instagramers alike love to rave about it.

Nonetheless, I was roaming Costco the other day and I saw a big tub of it and thought, “fiiiinnne, let’s see what all the hype is about,” and now I totally get the hype. This stuff is delicious! (Which shouldn’t be surprising, it’s peanut butter and like I said, I {heart} peanut butter). The fact that it’s lower in calorie and fat is still not a huge selling point for me but the fact that it works out a bit cheaper per serving versus actual peanut butter is, not to mention that it’s certified organic and non-GMO. I’m also loving the “less mess” aspect. I know it’s ridiculous to complain about cleaning a spoon, but sometimes I’m just in a rush and end up throwing a peanut buttery spoon into the sink to be ignored until I’ve run out of spoons and well…with this stuff, it takes less than a second to rinse the spoon. (What am I saying, I don’t even rinse the spoon, I just leave it in the tub.) I’m also totally digging how portable it is and how easily it mixes with any liquid. Normal peanut butter doesn’t mix well without a blender, but with this stuff I can just use a bottle with a mixing ball, and since it’s a powder, I can easily pack just a few no-mess servings making it perfect for road trips, camping trips, and busy days out. Color me delighted! Which is to say, if you love peanut butter as much as I do, I’d say this is definitely worth giving a try especially if you are in the market for a lower calorie lower fat solution to your peanut butter needs.

2. Oxi-Clean Laundry Spray

First of all, I can’t believe it’s been seven years since Billy Mays died… sad days. Second of all, I can’t believe I only just discovered the awesomeness of Oxi-Clean! Granted, I tend to be super skeptical of anything peddled on an infomercial (or commercial for that matter), but considering how happy I am with my Vitamix, my juicer, and my mandolin, one would think that I would have stopped writing things off just because they have their own spot on TV. Not so my friends. In fact, I’m not even the one that brought the Oxi-Clean bottle into my house, my friend did after spilling something on my bed. She felt horrible for having stained my sheet with her smoothie and bought a bottle of the Oxi-Clean Laundry spray in hopes that it would get the stain out. Well, it did! And I was so amazed by this that I decided to try it on my carpet which had quite a few stains courtesy of my two dogs. And guess what, it got them out too! Super dark set it in stains that I had tried all manner of carpet stain removal products on gone in under 5 minutes with just a few sprays of this stuff. I was so ecstatic over this discovery that I made my friend wait way longer than is probably acceptable to start the movie we had rented so that I could clean “just one more stain.”  Five stains later we actually started the movie, but you can bet that I was back at the carpet the next morning. Seriously, super impressed with this stuff (and a little confused by the few negative reviews on Amazon).

3. This video by Jason Silva (titled Romantic Infatuation and Longing)

I only just recently discovered Jason Silva and am quickly becoming a big fan of his. Thus far I’ve enjoyed just about everything of his that I’ve been exposed to and I’m super excited to expose myself to even more (and to do a little digging to learn more about him and what he’s all about).

This video in particular, however, resonated with me this past week as I’ve been contemplating the many things I’m longing for these days. Some of them things that are within my reach and others perhaps less so. I used to have a much more volatile relationship with longing. My happiness was often tied to whether or not I “got” what I longed for, and the not getting something often brought with it negative feelings: not enoughness, a lack, discontentedness… Somewhere in the past seven years, however, due much in part to the fact that Lyme Disease hindered my ability to emotionally connect to things, and thus long for them, my relationship to longing has changed considerably. These days my happiness isn’t tied to any outcome so much as it’s tied to the joy I feel whenever I find something that I crave so deeply. Having spent many years emotionally numb, not really longing for much, the wanting for me is often more than enough. Sometimes I chase what I want, sometimes I just acknowledge the longing with a smile and revel in what’s is telling me: that I’m alive, that I still desire, that I still hope for something. Like Jason says, “it’s not about possession, it’s not about getting what you want, it’s about knowing that you still want something.”

Realizing this has made a lot of things easier for me. Relationships for one. I no longer worry if I find myself attracted to someone while I’m in a relationships. It doesn’t shake my confidence in my feelings for my partner the way that it used to. Likewise, when I’m single and I catch myself thinking about someone, I’m less attached to the outcome of “getting” them and more able to just enjoy their presence in my life, in whatever capacity that may be. I don’t chase personal and professional goals with the weight of failure looming over me, so much as I do with excitement and joy. Longing doesn’t feel like a lack anymore, but more so a reminder that I’m alive, that I care, that things matter to me, that I’m not done exploring my potential and the universe’s potential. Longing often feels enough.

4. This quote.


 Because it’s totally true. Failure pales in comparison to not growing at all.

5. The Daybreaker Community

Technically I’ve known about Daybreaker morning dance parties for a while now but I kept letting my inhibitions get in the way of actually joining one. Even though I love the Daybreaker ethos, love dancing, and love the idea of all-you-need coconut water, fresh pressed juices, and healthy nibbles, I couldn’t get past the mental block of “I’m not cool enough to do that,” which is ridiculous for many reasons. The root of that thought was really just “I’m afraid of not fitting in” and recently I’ve been doing a lot in the way of getting past that fear and embracing the reality that simply by doing something I become the kind of person that would do it.

This realization has cradled me through many moments of self-expression and personal fulfillment this year. It was there when I went skinny dipping for the first time (after years of thinking “I’m just not that girl.”) It was there when I started wearing my hair in a braid or wearing the hat in the picture below or even painting my nails red (all things that I admired in other girls but thought were somehow “not me”). And it was there when I decided to buy tickets to this week’s Daybreaker dance. Sure, it helped that my friend was also down for going – partners in self-exploration are a wonderful thing – but what really drove my decision was my newfound sense of self, a self that isn’t defined by what I “am” or “am not” but rather by what I appreciate, what excites me, what I dedicate my time to, and what I dare to experience.

Daybreaker LA

If the thought of waking up early and starting your morning off with a dance party tickles your fancy, I highly recommend finding a Daybreaker event near you.

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2 thoughts on “Friday Finds #2

  1. Mary

    To me failure is not growing so if a year later I am I. The same place then I feel I have failed

    1. Tania

      That’s very much how I feel as well, Mary. Nothing frustrates me quite as much as a lack of progress.

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